I still feel like SHIT

I’m feeling very feverish today but my temperature seems pretty normal. I think right now my body is just following my mind into the deep shithole I don’t know how to get out of.

Freedom is only 10 days away but at the rate I’m going, I don’t think I’ll be able to make it through those 10 days. I don’t have a good feeling about my remaining days in hell – like duh! It’s hell for that reason – and I’m really uncertain about what’s gonna happen after that but I think right now, I shouldn’t be bothering about that because I’ve got other stuff to deal with.

The trip to Phuket is cancelled so I guess I won’t be able to “find myself” but Bankok still got the green light so hopefully that can help. All I got to do is live long enough till then because at the rate I’m going, I don’t think I need to kill myself; I’ll probably die on my own.

I feel like SHIT

I’m going through a really unhappy phase of my life right now. It all started last Monday when I woke up feeling as if someone close to me had died. Some of you might have gotten my message asking if everything was alright. If you didn’t understand why I asked such a question, now you know.

So since that day I’ve been feeling like shit every day. I cry for no reason at all, my thoughts are constantly negative, it takes so much effort just concentrating on something that others may find effortless, I’m losing my appetite, having troubles sleeping; basically my life is on a downward spiral.

So on Tuesday (this Tuesday) I finally got to see a doctor about it and I was given 3 days of MC. I’ve spent those 3 days well, doing things that I’d call “happy things” and hanging out with close friends and my family but whenever all of that ends, I just go back to square one and my world is back to being grey.

I really hope that things get better and that I don’t decide to kill myself like hang myself from a tree or something. But even if that does happen, just be happy for me that I’m no long feeling like shit on a daily basis.

New MP3!

I've finally bought a new MP3 player today! I initially had decided on this: http://www.sony.com.sg/product/nwz-s739f but I still kindda wanted http://www.sony.com.sg/product/nwz-a829 for its Bluetooth functions but due to the price difference, I decided to take the former instead and Bluetooth wasn't a must for me; it would just be more convenient to transfer files.

So I headed to Sony today and, lucky me, the latter was going for only $299! $100 cheaper than the other model and $160 cheaper than its normal price. Both model are pretty much on par (or at least I think so) so I just made things easy for myself and went for the cheaper one. And the other good thing about Bluetooth is that I'll be able to use wireless earphones.

But too bad I can't use it so soon. The initial charge is 8 hours and I don't have time to wait for it to charge that long so I've got to stick with the shitty Samsung one for this week.